Tribal HeartsTribal Hearts › Guides › First conversations
Talk first: your first conversations
On Tribal Hearts nobody has to decide anything on the first day. You match, you talk, and the two of you decide together whether to take it further. This guide helps make those first conversations easy and comfortable.
How chat works in the app
Send an interest to someone you like, or accept an interest someone sent you.
Once an interest is accepted, you are a match.
Use a contact to start the chat. Every verified member gets 10 contacts a month; Premium gives 30.
Talk with text, voice notes and stickers. The free plan allows 300 messages a day.
The first message
Keep it short and warm. Greet the person the way your community does, mention something from their profile, and ask one easy question.
Good first messages
- "Johar! I saw you also come from Ranchi district. Which village is your family from?"
- "Jai Seva. You wrote that you are studying nursing. How do you like it?"
Avoid these
- Only "Hi", with nothing else.
- Asking for a phone number or more photos straight away.
- Comments only about how someone looks.
What to talk about in the first weeks
There is no set order. These are questions people often want answered before they bring in their families:
- Family: Who do you live with? What do your parents hope for?
- Work and study: What do you do now, and what are your plans?
- Home: Would you live in the village or in a town? Who would look after the parents?
- Customs: Which festivals does your family celebrate? How are weddings done in your family?
- Everyday life: Food, free time, faith, the people you are close to.
- After marriage: Should both of you work? Where would you live?
Answer honestly and let the other person take their time. Short, regular conversations often work better than very long ones.
Bringing in your families
When you both feel comfortable, tell your families. In many communities a match becomes real only when the families meet.
Share the tribe, sub-tribe and clan details early. If the families' rules do not allow the match, it is kinder for everyone to know before feelings grow.
Saying no kindly
It is fine to stop talking when it does not feel right. A short, polite message is enough:
"Thank you for your time. I don't think we are the right match, and I wish you well."
If someone keeps messaging after you have said no, or makes you uncomfortable at any point, block them. You can also report them, and reports reach our team directly.
Respect and safety
- Never pressure anyone for photos, a phone number or a meeting.
- Never send money to a match, whatever the reason. Read why in our safety guide.
- Keep talking in the app until you trust the person. Screenshots of chats are blocked on Android, which protects both of you.
Good things start with a conversation.
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